Sometimes it's just really hard for me to be the wife God calls me to be. It's not that my husband doesn't deserve it. He does. It's not even that I can't do it. I can. It's that I'm a stubborn and often selfish human.
When we first got married it was so much easier for me. I wanted to please him all the time. I lived each day to make his day a better one.
Now, just over six years later, I have my own things to accomplish. My own responsibilities. I sometimes see what I'm doing as more important than being his helpmate. That is where I'm screwing up. It's not that what I'm doing isn't important. It's that he is more important than what I'm doing.
I used to look for ways to do special things for him... unexpected things. When I packed his lunch, I wrote him a note and included a Bible verse for him. I can't remember the last time I did that. I don't know why I stopped. It makes me sad to think that he may be wondering the same thing... "She used to do this and now she doesn't."
I thank God every day that He brought us together. We really are meant for one another and generally get along very well. I try not to take him for granted. I really do. I try to tell him every day how much I love him and appreciate all he does for me and our family. He truly is a wonderful man. I am proud to be married to him.
I want to do better though. I want to go back to the days of anticipating his needs and placing those needs before mine. I want to be sure that he knows I'm doing everything I can to make his life easier because he deserves that much.
Here's to me being the wife God called me to be...
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