Ain't that the truth?! Just when you go and get used to how things are, they change and you're forced to accept, adapt, and move on. Most of the time I'm pretty good with change. Change can be refreshing. Exciting. An improvement, even. Other times, not so much. Change can be scary. Intimidating. And, did I mention scary?
Like I said, most of the time, I'm pretty adaptable. Change doesn't ordinarily bother me or cause too big of a ruckus in my life. However, something in my life is changing and I'm really struggling with it.
Here's the story:
My parents divorced when I was just two. I saw my dad a handfull of times throughout my life and to this day have a strained relationship with him. For the majority of my life, it was always just my mom and me. We were buddies. Always together like Peas & Carrots. PB & J. Macaroni & Cheese. I think you get the point.
After my parents divorced, my mother dated a man named Skip for a while. I can't say how long because I was so young. I have a few vague memories of him but nothing too significant. I remember that I loved him and I remember that I missed him when he left.
Needless to say, after the divorce from my father and the painful breakup with Skip, my mother never remarried. She didn't want what had happened to her to happen to me. She was abused sexually and physically by her stepfather when she was a little girl. Throughout my childhood, and even until now, I never saw her with a man. She never dated. She never talked on the phone to any man.
She did spend the rest of her life, until this day, pining after Skip. I'm being totally honest when I say that she spoke of him often. Cried over him more than I care to remember. And prayed for him to come back to her more than is probably healthy for any human to do. Not that prayer isn't healthy, but you know what I mean. Anyways, for years and years, she loved this man with her whole heart.
She told me a story recently that when I was young - maybe 10 or so - I had called a friend of our family who remained in contact with Skip through the years. I had told this friend that I wanted her to call him and have him come back. It would be my mommy's birthday soon and I wanted to give her Skip as a gift. See? Even in my youth I was cooler than cool. ;) Kidding.
About a year and a half ago, my mom was up for a visit. We were sitting and talking, just the two of us, as we had done countless times before. She mentioned Skip's name... again. I saw the glimmer of hope in her eyes that maybe, just maybe, God would be gracious enough to grant her prayer. I don't know what came over me, but I picked up my laptop and did a search for him. I found his phone number and called him. While my mom sat staring at me in disbelief. I know. It was maybe the craziest thing I've ever done.
I told him I just wanted to see how he was after all these years. I told him a little about my life and that we live in Minnesota. I didn't share any contact information, or even my married name, and he didn't ask. It was a fairly short, but pleasant conversation as I could tell I had completely caught him off guard. After we hung up, I had a hard time convincing my mom that I had actually spoken with him. She thought I had played a horrible joke on her... because I do that often. Really.
I wrote his name and number on a piece of paper, folded it up, and handed it to her. I don't know why. It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time. After that moment, I figured it was done. I didn't expect to hear another word about it again.
That's exactly what happened until a few short months ago...
No comments:
Post a Comment